14 Marzo 2011

This is not an entry for Grandma, my Aunts, or those weak of stomach to read.

Ok, so I was raised Episcopalian.

I have read the bible... twice.

I appreciate it, I appreciate the man Jesus Christ.

I just never identified him above all. He was great, and I love him, but there are a lot of great people in the history of the world that I also love: Ghandi, Mother Teresa, Nichiren Daishonin, Moses, Eve, Pachamama, and so much more.

Toward the end of my adolescence, though, I started to really pull away from Christianity because of the crazy things I saw people doing in the name of Jesus. Normal, natural things that Christians were prohibiting in the name of god. It broke me. It made me hate what Jesus has become. How twistedly people have straight up changed the beautiful words of Jesus made me despise his following. I resisted him because of them, skipping religious songs when they came up on my ipod, changing the channel when religious programs came up. I rejected the practice, but all along, I continued my personal discourse with god

Then, I moved to South America, a prodigiously Catholic society. At first I rolled my eyes and smiled and nodded while gritting my teeth, thinking, "how silly". Their floral Jesus decorations, and apparent obsession with the virgin mary made me more sad than anything. It didn't seem real. It seemed like a fake title to me. "Christian" "Catholic" just a title plastered by your family or society that everyone left mid life, but came back to in adulthood to teach their kids. A charade.

But, after living here for almost a year now, something has changed. I am sad. Lives here are sad, and hopeless for real change. If we are lucky, we can change the lives of a few generations down the road, but in the meantime, you struggle to get by.

Now, I say, who cares what religion you are, as long has you have faith? Faith is the only thing that keeps you alive each day. Faith in the potential for future generations is the only thing that keeps you from drinking the pesticide you put on your crops. The day a man or woman loses the faith, is the day their neighbor finds them in the field foaming at the mouth and convulsing.

Now, how can I judge anyone's faith? All I can do is be glad that I have faith in the mystic law and so does just about everyone I love.