14 Abril 2012

a week ago we had 10 resumes sent to us to review for the position of VALE teacher and librarian.
a week ago the mayor choose a day and time to meet with the VALE committee to review the applicants and choose two or three to interview.
a week ago my committee and i show up to an empty mayor's office.
a week ago, standing in his empty office with his secretary, I call him. He begs forgiveness, very politely. He has no transport to Madrigal.
a week ago, I forgive the disrespect of him neither showing, nor letting me know he wouldn't be present.
I tell him that we will continue moving forward and select three of the ten applicants that fit his and our criteria.
a week ago, I ask him, "When would you like to interview them?"
he tells me, "Next Sunday, the 15th."




this week the applicants are invited and confirmed to come
this week I popped down to the municipality the night before the meeting to confirm time, place, and that everyone will be present.
this week, i am greeted by the secretary who says the mayor won't be in in time for the meeting, and non of the councilmen know about it.
this week i go to the councilman of education's house, and he tries to hide from me. When i tell his wife that i know he is there he comes out and says he might be able to come to the meeting if he can. I tell him that isn't good enough, he has to be there so a member of the municipality is present. If he can't be present, he needs to tell me right now who will be so i can confirm with them. He says not to worry, he, or the lieutenant mayor will be present.
I go to the lieutenant mayor's house and no one is home.
this week i go back to the municiple offices and ask the secretary to call the mayor, that i need to talk to him. She is kind, and sweet, calls him and passes me the phone.
this week i ask the mayor why everyone is skirting me? why hasn't he fulfilled his side of the deal and organized his co-workers? I have fulfilled my side, I need him to step up to his. I speak of trust and of the children that we are both working for.
this week he tells me that the high school english teacher quit, and the ministry of education isn't sending anyone else so the kids won't have a teacher. he tells me the money they allocated for the after school teacher might need to go to an english teacher for the high school.
"why didn't you tell me this, why are you all just running from me? It isn't fair for me to have called these applicants in to interview tomorrow morning if there isn't a position for them. It makes me and my organization look bad and irresponsible."
"Couldn't we just postpone the hiring of someone until we meet with parents and ask them what they want? A VALE teacher or an English teacher?"
"I am sorry Señor Mayor, but I have been asking you to handle those types of things since November of 2011. Now, I have to leave in 4 months. That is barely enough time to get someone through the paperwork and trained. I know you are trying to work with me for your kids here, but your lack of management skills are causing these kids to loose out. I am sorry I have to do this, but you either have someone present tomorrow for these interviews, or I am canceling the entire program and taking all of the supplies to another village that is more capable of helping their kids and wants me there. I can't have you skirting this for another 6 months."

my heart stops.
my right breast starts to ache like the child i never had is biting me with a mouth full of teeth.
why my stress chose to manifest in my breast instead of my stomach is beside me.
i dont breathe


I have to repeat my ultimatum about 4 more times to the mayor until he understands: I am done. I really can't make this program sustainable unless we more forward now, and I am not going to reward them with supplies if they can't show me the responsibility to protect and give their children access to them.

i speak clear, and strong. "you have to have someone present tomorrow, or VALE and the madrigal library is over. gone. thousands of dollars down the drain."

I am emotionally exhausted. my heart, my face, my lungs, my chest. everything about to explode.

An equally emotionally exhausted and quiet voice responds, "I will send an official mandate to the lieutenant mayor and councilman of education that they have to be present."

"thank you señor mayor. we will talk about other details when you get here. have a good evening and a safe journey back."

I pass the phone back to the secretary. she speaks to the mayor about the mandate, then confirms with me that she will deliver them. i believe her.
I shake the hand of the councilman of education who is downstairs and tell him about the mandate and smile and say, "see you tomorrow at 10:30am en punto, thank you sir."


my i am not relieved. there isn't a part of me that trusts these men. what i do trust is that the secretary will deliver the mandates, that is the only reason i left the office with the program not cancelled.
I go straight to Meche's. shaking, clutching my aching breast

"hug me"
no questions asked, i am engulfed in Meche. she rubs my back and says, "why are you grabbing your self like that? and she slaps my hand from my chest."

I fill her in. she says, "well here is to hoping someone shows up tomorrow. if they don't, you are right, we are done. can't carry this on our own... feel better now, sweetheart?"
"i do. see you at 10am my good friend."




15 Abril 2012

In the morning I walk down to the municipality at flag raising at 8am to confirm, again, that everyone will be there. The lieutenant mayor is not present, and the councilman of education turns his back to me to pretend i don't exist.
I walk right around him so I am in front of his face, "I wanted to confirm with you that you will be here today, en punto, at 1030am."
"If I can I will be here."
"You have to be there, not being there is not an option. Who will open the doors? Who will accept these applicants who have come to meet the administration. You are the Councilman of Education, this is your responsibility."
he backs away from me laughing, out of disrespect, "Sunday is my day off." He says shaking his head.
"I did not choose Sunday, your mayor did. I am here on MY Sunday too. Working for YOUR son. You do know Yamil comes to the library everyday, don't you?"
He shakes his head and walkes away from me.
I follow him to his house, his wife opens the door, I smile and step past her into their home. she knows me, she trusts me. "If you won't be present you need to give me the keys so I can recieve them into the Municiple offices, as promised by your mayor."
"I am not giving you anything without the Mayor's approval."
"Did you not get the mandate?"
"No, I got not mandate."
He is lying, "Then call the mayor, right now and find out if I am lying to you."
He steps up to me as if to intimidate me. His chest puffed up, pressing into my personal bubble, "No."
I lift my chin and put strength behind my voice, I raise my volume only slightly, "How can you disrespect me, after all I have done for your children, and everything I want to do for them. How on Earth can you be so disrespectful to anyone?"
He laughs at me.
This, is how they treat their women. Toys.

He raises his hand to push me out of his way, and I step aside before he can touch me and make it obvious I don't have him touching me. I look to his wife. She looks like a fully toothed infant might be biting her breast now.

I leave without saying the proper formal goodbyes.
I go to my gossipy host mother and tell her I am leaving Madrigal if the Municipality doesn't have anyone present for the interviews today, and I need her to tell everyone she knows that the Councilman of Education disrespected me for the last time today. I need her to make it public that I am being treated badly by the Municipality. I need the women to speak up for their children and start nagging the mayor and other members of the Municipality so they take action now. She nods like I have never seen her nod before. I can see her chatting with every woman she knows, getting them all behind this.

I go to Meche and Hirma, we debrief. If someone from the Municipality doesn't show up, we will march. Mothers and children. We we show the Mayor we want this.  The word starts to trickle around town, shop to shop, field to field.

I go to the lieutenant mayors house again. If we can avoid a racket, that would be a good thing. Darling Rita, his daughter, and faithful library attendee is there. She is 16-years-old, beautiful, and smart. She studies English diligently with me. "I need you to get this message to your father that we are canceling VALE if he doesn't show up today. Do you want VALE to continue?"
"yes!" reply wide eyes
"Then i need you to make sure he is present."
"of course!"


i dial the phone, "hello mr. mayor, I am sorry to tell you this, but I can't track down the lieutenant mayor and the councilman of education treated me very disrespectfully this morning. I am extremely upset with how your councilman treated me, and I want to make sure that you know that he told me he won't be present. if someone isn't there, i will cancel the program. I have done everything in my power to keep it alive, now I need you to act."
startled, concerned, and urgent he says, "someone will be there."


this morning at 10:15am the lieutenant mayor comes to my door.
"Good morning, Señorita. Sorry about the confusion. Are you ready to go interview?"

this morning the lieutenant mayor and i walk together, all smiles, to meet with the applicants